9am - sign in and get paperwork done for picc line.
10:30am - PICC line is in!
They numbed it, so I didn’t feel a thing at the time but it was sore once the meds wore off. If you don’t know what that is, PICC stands for “Peripherally Inserted Central Catheter” and it’s basically a permanent IV. It goes into my lower arm by my elbow and up through my upper arm, then down to my heart. See photo:
I’ll get my medications and chemotherapy through it, and when they draw blood, they’ll use it. It prevents me from having to get an IV every visit or getting poked 857 times when they draw my blood. It will stay in my arm for the next 7 weeks, at least. I can’t get it wet, so I had to buy a special neoprene shower sleeve thing from Amazon for showers. $30, but it’ll be worth it if it works. (Update - used it this morning to shower and it works great! My arm was dry as a bone!)
Left a little after 11 and got some quick lunch, then headed to next appointment at the cancer center.
12:00 - Labwork. They drew a lot of blood. Like, a lot a lot. Kris’s eyes kept getting bigger and bigger. They did it through the picc line, which was nice already not getting stuck again.
1:00pm - Radiation dept for the body mold.
Y’all, this one is going to be a little graphic (but funny) so if “tmi” isn’t your thing, I’d skip this part....
I had to lay on a table on what looked like deflated pool floats. They move my body parts around til they’re exactly like they want them, then the stuff I’m laying on inflates around me and feels super weird, but immediately hardens. It reminded me of the stuff you spray around the AC window units. Then they come pull my pants down about 6 inches and draw a black X in several spots and put some button things on them (one has already fallen off, oops) to show exactly where the beams need to be aimed I guess, and then they turn the lights down real dim and send me up into the radiation tube thing (same thing you get a CT Scan in) to do a simulation to make sure everything is where it needs to be.
So here’s where it gets funny. They run me in and out a few times and then come back into the room and this conversation happens:
Lab tech 1: Mrs. Adams, we have a problem.
Me: Okay... what’s wrong?
Lab tech 1: You have an air pocket in your rectum. We need to remove it.
Me: I have a what now??
Lab tech 2 (Nicole): You have an air bubble in your rectum.
Me: Are you saying I have a ghost fart?
Nicole: (laughs) Yes ma’am, you can call it that.
Nurse 1: Dr. Outlaw is bringing a catheter to remove it so we can proceed.
Dr. Outlaw shows up, and because I’m laying in a body mold and can’t move, they have to lift me up, pull my pants and underwear down to my knees. Then they turn on all the lights and put a lubed catheter in my butt and manually remove this so-called air pocket. I tell them this is the most bizarre thing I’ve ever experienced, and they could have at least left the lights all dim and romantic for this violation. Nicole and the other nurse’s eyes are big as saucers and they’re trying hard not to laugh. It’s dead silent. I ask what’s so funny. She said it happens a lot and sometimes when the catheter is removed, there’s a loud sound and they are waiting for it to happen. Y’all. I can’t even make this stuff up! I’ve never had someone manually remove a fart from my body. But there’s a first time for everything. Being the kind of person I am, I couldn’t wait to tell Kris. I’m so glad he embraces my weirdness and laughs with me about these things. Nicole just shook her head as I’m telling the story. She probably thinks I'm weird. She's right. She just doesn't know it yet.
2:00pm - Biopsy with Dr. Scalici.
Yep, more biopsies. She had to cut 7 individual pieces of my tumor off for the trial. Apparently I bled a lot or something, they (several people were in the room) kept asking me if I was okay over and over, telling me I was a trooper, and one hugged me when it was over and said I was the best biopsy patient ever. It hurt like a bitch but it had to be done. Except, technically, it didn’t. I agreed to the trial. I didn’t have to do this but like I said before, if this trial helps them find new ways to treat this and help other people in the future, then I’m doing it. Then they slathered my inner vag with that peanut butter stuff (still don’t know the actual name of it) that stops the bleeding and let me get dressed.
I’ll finally be starting chemo Tuesday. I go in Monday morning for ‘chemo class’ and bloodwork, then show up Tuesday for my first chemo. Pretty sure I’ll start radiation then as well.
The journey begins!
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